Challenge.

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This past week has been challenging. It’s been fantastic.
I was at uni, doing an intensive week course in business. Having started off my university degree originally in business, I never thought I’d revisit it… but here we are. The end of my degree is looming and I feel something… brewing in the ocean of my life.

Self-worth. Who am I to not be my brilliant self? I have so much to offer – something I have been denying. “I have no skills”…”I am not qualified to do anything”…”What am I going to do after I finish my degree?”… I have faith. I can help, contribute, heal, connect. I am safe, secure, grounded, connected, free.

Reality's FableReality’s Fable – by Autumn Skye

That which is not meant for me will tell me. It is up to me to listen, and to act. It does not have to be sad, for yes I have left behind a lot… but look how far I have come… I have gone, in the space of five years, from a young girl suffering from depression, bulimia, and a severe lack of self-worth and coping mechanisms… to a young woman who holds within her to keys to her healing, who left behind a life of cutting her skin to shreds and instead learnt to scream… a woman who once tiptoed through her life and is now learning to roar… a woman who once tried to fit in with the crowd and who now acknowledges the path before her, whether it be through jungles filled with scraggly branches, or a wide open field… together or alone… I’ve gone from a young girl who was convinced there was nothing beyond this earthly form to knowing God in the most amazing, and indescribable ways…

After My LoveAfter My Love – Autumn Skye

Crack me open to reveal only Truth. Let what is not fall like fragments to the Earth… I am capable of communicating my Truth, my essence, my Voice… and my voice can heal… my hands can heal… my hugs can heal… I am allowed to be seen, heard, and felt. I deserve to live. I deserve love. I deserve the Love of God.

Every child deserves the Love of God.

You deserve the Love of God.

Sat Nam,
Kelsey ❤

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The Dance of Life.

‘Flower Fantasy’ – Ann Powell.

I may not be able to speak, but I can move.
I may not be able to sing, but I can dance.
I may not be able to express myself, but I can feel.
I may not be able to find my words, but I can find my Self with every beat of the big, bad drum…
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On Friday night I went to my first ever ‘ecstatic/trance dance’ workshop, combined with sacred intention setting and breath-work… and it was… intoxicating, revealing, liberating, connecting, grounding, expanding, feeling, showing, celebrating, rejoicing, accepting, living…

I have found my self lately struggling to communicate. Struggling for words to come out, right or at all. Struggling to feel as though I am conveying my message accurately. This workshop… we began with a sacred circle, going around and stating our name and what we both wished to let go of, and to bring in to the new year… As we went further and further around the circle, closer to me, I felt my body hum more and more, vibrate more intensely till it was my turn and I felt like the only thing holding me there were the two hands of each person either side… The energy of the circle, everyone’s attention was feeding me, recognising me as here, as present and they were truly listening... So I stated my name… and my intention… that this year I wish to let go of and complete all contracts and agreements I have entered into as my past self that do not serve my highest good, to release the masks I feel the need to hide behind… and to bring in a new foundation, to bring my Self into life, and genuine feeling… (that second part just came out, and to be honest I can’t actually remember what the first thing I called in was, but I feel it was something around those lines…)…

In any case, we stretched and began dancing around the room… Dancing with others as we felt… I danced with a beautiful friend in a pure, childlike celebration, a rejoycement of all things fun in life and it was glorious… Then we put our blindfolds on and for the next hour (it could have been two… I have no idea how long it was because time didn’t really feel like it existed)… we just danced. Our dance. Our own dance. The dance of Kelsey. How we felt our bodies needed to be moved. How we felt called to be moved… and it was amazing. Liberating. Freeing. Occasionally I’d bump into someone and I had so many incredible connections… What one can experience with a connection of the hands, no words, no sight, just the Truth that lies within the hands… that is special, sacred. Heads together, palms together, I bless you, I love you, I see you.

After trance dancing to the point of pouring sweat, of pure intoxication with life, of coming so deep down into my body and my Truth, after expanding out and out and out… we came onto our mats for a breath-work session, using a re-birthing breath. Having had a few sessions in this method before, I recognised that a similar thing was occurring. My hands, my arms, there was so much energy there, all of it was being directed and they were so tense. I couldn’t relax them by my sides, and the wonderful woman who was running the workshop came over a few times to place my hands back by my sides but they literally rose up and no matter how hard I breathed they were like that. That had happened in a previous session with a breath-work practitioner, who mentioned that anger is often stored in the arms etc… and then as we were standing in the circle, both before and after, stating our intentions and then our experiences after dance and breath-work… I had the thought that I am powerful. Not in a mastery of the Universe type way, but that this energy that flows through me, into my hands, not everyone has that. Not every one experiences that.

I so often discount my own experiences for the thought of denying the fact that someone else could experience it too… and whilst yes, that is true, we all have the potential… we all manifest it differently… So what lies in my hands? My hips? My sides? I feel that I can tell a thousand stories with just a brush of my hand, that my words will never match up to my emotional world… I feel that the lovers touch is one of the most beautiful and expressive communications in the world… It is healing to be seen, to be seen with the hands, to be seen with the body… To be felt, to be heard, physically, emotionally, kinetically…

Gypsy dance gold sparkle decor:

In any case, I know that will not be the only time I dance… I feel a deep calling to be in my body right now, to express myself physically, to explore the layers within and to do deep healing, clearing, expressing… and I need a little help too. I trust I’ll find it in the right way, with the right person, at the right time…

I AM CONNECTED.
I AM GROUNDED.
I AM FREE.
I AM LOVE.
I AM.

Sat Nam, Kelsey.

P.s. I love this song at the moment; ‘Amen Omen’ by Ben Harper. Enjoy ❤

AUM…

I found this version of the Gayatri mantra on youtube the other day and the rhythm of it made me smile big. I hope you enjoy it too.
Blessings & Sat Nam
Kelsey.

Om Bhoor Bhuvah Svah
Tat Savitur Varenyam
Bhargo Devasya Dheemahi
Dhiyo Yonah Prochodayaat.
(roughly)
Oh Creator of the Universe!
We meditate on thy supreme splendour.
May thy radiant power illuminate our intellects,
destroy our sins, and guide us in the right direction!

The Beauty of Savasana

It’s almost a bit of a joke when someone says that their favourite yoga pose is savasana, or that it is the one they find the most difficult… Little chuckles follow this statement, but never in cruelty… always laughter because it can be so, so true…

I went back to kundalini yoga class for the first time this year on the weekend. To tell the truth, I just hadn’t been feeling like it for weeks, instead focusing on grounding hatha yoga asana and yin yoga practices… Melting into my body and seeing what was presenting itself in my body… To tell even more of the truth I feel like I almost didn’t want to fully ‘face myself’ as I knew kundalini yoga class would push me to do…

Alas, I went. I am so glad I did. The class itself was not overly strenuous, and I allowed myself to move as I saw fit, finding myself quite often in a deep squat; feet balanced and strongly connected to the earth, back straight, elbows pushing out my knees slightly and hands in prayer position before my forehead… In any case, by the time we reached savasana I was ready to rest… and then the call came to start to move again and sit up and I thought… no… I was resting.


I honestly don’t think I’ve allowed myself to rest so deeply in so long… I think my body is calling for it, drinking it up, allowing the work to be done without the mind in the way… So I savasana’d all throughout the ending Sat Nam mantra and meditation and all the way through people packing up and eventually came to feeling like a veil had been pulled from my eyes… That feeling I get when I’m half-way between sleep and waking in a deliciously rested way…  Carefree, childlike and simply me.

I’ve been sleeping so much lately and resting a heck of a lot… Relaxing… I feel like some serious things are shifting and moving about… that my body is charging up… and all of this is okay… Just as is the call to relax in savasana for a long, long time…

Peace & love ❤
Kayleigh XXX

 

Itchy Feet.

Dreams of international departures, of meeting a friend to go backpacking and being quizzed on why we think we’re good travel partners… Laughing because there were so many reasons… We’re both adventure seekers, once travelled around the states for three weeks together in a tiny van, and are rock-climbing buddies. We legit trust each other with our lives. We would be bad-ass travel partners.

As of now, I only have a few trips to Sydney planned for the year for yoga teacher training… But I need more. I have vague plans to head off in 2017, but I need to make it concrete. I need a second job. Let’s get this damn show on the road!! Bring on Patagonia!! Torres Del Paine Costa Rica!! La Amazona!! Ireland!! Spain!! Germany!! Nepal!! India!! Let’s get cracking…